Krumpin: Cousins won the argument. Monday still has the eraser.
Week 8, Sunday, provisional: Kirk Cousins had the room arguing, Joe Burrow had the scoreboard, and Monday still has the eraser.
By Skip Krump, Senior Columnist, Unlicensed League Psychiatrist.
The Sunday games are done. The week is not. Yahoo’s Krumpin scorebugs below were current at 8:57 p.m. Pacific, and every one of them still has at least one Monday player attached. A lead is a lead. It is not a win.
The seven live scorebugs
Haters Gonna Hate 159.13, DGAD 81.66. This is the loud one, and the live projection still has Haters at 196.30 because Jaxon Smith-Njigba and D’Andre Swift have not played. Cousins scored 30.88, Brock Bowers 25.1, Bhayshul Tuten 30.8, and Jonah Coleman 20.2. Coleman was not the bench punchline. He was in the lineup. The chat punchline was the trade. Duy called Cousins-for-Wilson “QB1 for trash WR.” Hieu added the vomit emoji. Richard said anyone might have made that deal with Penix on the bench, and Haters answered by daring the room to beat Wilson for Cousins. Easy after the points. Harder before them.
Dan’s Deepball 148.97, BNF 92.10. Joe Burrow scored 42.18, Patrick Mahomes 27.24, Ja’Marr Chase 25.8, and Pittsburgh’s defense 21.75. BNF’s Tyler Allgeier answered with 35.6, but Spencer Rattler’s line is still pending and does not have a usable projection on the Yahoo row. Richard spent the morning asking who wanted Lamar and threatening to leave a quarterback slot empty. By evening, Rachaad White’s last drive had ended the laughing. Zach Charbonnet is still waiting on Monday. That is a chance, not a comeback.
4th and INCHES 167.91, EzMoney 104.34. Tee Higgins scored 34.0, Bucky Irving 23.5, and Chuba Hubbard 22.3. EzMoney got 20.3 from Trevor Lawrence and 20.0 from James Cook III, then watched Cook’s injury scare hit the chat. George Kittle has no score or projection on the pending row, and Emanuel Wilson is the Monday piece. Neither one turns 63.57 points into a small problem.
King James 144.71, Dat’s It 124.40. Tony Pollard scored 27.8, which Haters accurately described as Walter Payton arriving unannounced. Dat’s It had Jordan Love at 22.82, Josh Jacobs at 20.9, and Bo Nix at 20.28. Jason Myers is the only Monday player left in the matchup. A 20.31-point deficit is not usually a kicker’s job.
Kittle Corn 137.40, Ghost of Twomp 95.68. Jaylen Warren scored 23.5, Michael Wilson 23.4, and Tampa Bay’s defense 22.0. Ghost has Jahmyr Gibbs at 27.7, but Caleb Williams and Chicago’s defense are both still on Monday. The live projection, 155.25 to 119.65, says the current lead survives that. It does not say the chat has to behave until then. Twomp’s line about Tampa Bay was the best one in the export: “The only players on TB that can catch the ball are on the defense.”
My Team Sucks! 120.54, Tony’s Terrific Team 88.46. Drake Maye scored 23.66. Tony got 26.2 from Braelon Allen, then ran out of Sunday. Colston Loveland and Luther Burden III are both Monday players. Seattle’s defense is My Team Sucks!’s remaining piece. The gap can shrink. It cannot honestly be described as coin-flip theater.
Ball Don’t Lie 78.79, GolfNut 67.81. This is the ugly one. Haters looked at Drake London, Zay Flowers, and Penix and still had Ball Don’t Lie favored over Richard. The final Sunday numbers made the lead only 10.98, with Zach Charbonnet still live for GolfNut. Penix finished the day as a chat target, not a box-score miracle. Binh’s last word was not subtle: “Penix ….” Twomp added that it was five more completions than Mayfield. The Buccaneers won anyway. Fantasy did not grade the hurricane on a curve.
Love, hate, and one leftover
Love: Joe Burrow and the rest of Dan’s Deepball. A 42.18-point quarterback does not need the group chat to explain him.
Love: Kirk Cousins, for the points and the argument. The 30.88 does not settle whether Wilson was the right long-term price. It does settle who had the better Sunday.
Hate: The Lamar Jackson hour. One play, a hand issue, three quarterbacks deep, and half the room volunteering medical advice. GolfNut did not need the jokes. GolfNut needed a second quarterback who could survive a thumb.
Hate: Every post-game trade genius. The Cousins criticism may be fair. Captain Hindsight still posted on time.
The leftover call: I trust Caleb Williams and Chicago’s defense to make Ghost’s 41.72-point deficit less embarrassing. I do not trust them to catch Kittle Corn. That is a call, not a result. Monday still belongs to Chicago at Seattle, and nobody in this league gets a trophy for being ahead on Sunday night.
