NorCal-Aussie: RedPanda pays fifty for the mustache; the sixth chair wobbles
RedPanda arrived at the waiver desk with a 2–6 record and a $50 offer for Gardner Minshew II. Tuten My Own Horn offered $10; Wheat Hill Weasels offered $9. There was a market for the quarterback, but nobody else brought a fifty. Across the table, the Raptors are 3–5 after scoring a Week 8 high of 184.56. It is that sort of family dinner: some people spend to repair the menu, and others walk in carrying dessert.
The FAB receipts
Gardner Minshew II, $50 to RedPanda. Tuten My Own Horn ($10) and Wheat Hill Weasels ($9) also bid. Forty dollars clear of the next offer is not a bargain; it is a quarterback emergency with its own seating chart.
Mike Washington Jr., $6 to Ninja Turtles. Byrobowl || offered $3 and Shough Me the Money offered $2. The current sixth seed bought a little depth while the leaders picked at the same plate.
Mike Gesicki, $8 to Bryce Young…. Shough Me the Money offered $1. The seventh-place club paid for the tight end with one eye on a playoff chair just 11.98 season points away.
Tyler Bass, $4 to Bryce Young…. Shough Me the Money offered $0. The kicker did not command a bidding war, but four dollars is an honest price to put a foot under an incomplete table.
The other Nov. 4 awarded claims were Joe Fagnano for $11 to Block Party Ray, Mike Washington Jr. already counted above, Greg Dulcich for $2 to Shough Me the Money, Eagles defense for $2 and Dylan Sampson for $1 to Block Party Ray, and Daniel Carlson ($0) and Cowboys defense ($0) to Shough and Lathrop respectively. Bryce Young… also added Tyler Bass as noted. Do not mistake the absence of a visible competing offer on those claims for proof that nobody wanted the player. The free-agent ledger also shows Shough Me the Money adding Cairo Santos and dropping Michael Penix Jr., then sending Santos back to free agency a minute later. Lathrop later added Adonai Mitchell and dropped Kayshon Boutte, then sent Elic Ayomanor to waivers. Those are the free-agent and drop transactions visible through Wednesday morning; a drop is not a new signing.
Week 9: six games, no reserved place cards
Ninja Turtles vs Lathrop Raptors. Sixth place meets the 3–5 club that just scored 184.56. Ninja brings Josh Allen and Drake Maye on the Wednesday board; Lathrop has Ja’Marr Chase, Derrick Henry and a newly added Adonai Mitchell. A direct bubble game has better table manners than any prediction.
Baldy vs RedPanda. Both are 2–6. Baldy has Joe Burrow and Justin Herbert; RedPanda now has Minshew but lists Geno Smith and Kyler Murray in the Wednesday starters. Fifty dollars is not a lineup point until somebody uses the new quarterback.
Byrobowl || vs Shough Me the Money. Two 6–2 clubs, first against third. Byrobowl has Matthew Stafford and Jared Goff listed; Shough has Jayden Daniels but empty QB, TE and kicker slots on the Wednesday snapshot. Those slots may be filled before kickoff. The leader already lost to an underdog last week; this is no place to leave chairs empty.
True QB vs Bryce Young…. The 2–6 side has Caleb Williams and Jordan Love; the 4–4 challenger shows Dak Prescott and Bryce Young. Bryce Young… is one place outside the playoffs today and still has an empty kicker slot on this early board.
Block Party Ray vs Sunday Best Phong. Ray comes off the Shough upset and just spent $11 on Joe Fagnano. Sunday Best is 5–3 with Patrick Mahomes and Kirk Cousins in the listed lineup. The new quarterback is a bench option until the lineup says otherwise.
Tuten My Own Horn vs Wheat Hill Weasels. Second place faces fifth. Tuten has Trevor Lawrence and a currently empty superflex slot; Weasels have Brock Purdy and Daniel Jones. The Wednesday board is an unfinished place setting, not a score forecast.
Playoff picture — November 4, 2026
Six teams make the Weeks 15–17 bracket; Yahoo ranks the whole league together and reseeds. This is the completed Week 8 standings snapshot, before any Week 9 kickoff. IN means in today, not clinched. OUT means below the line, not mathematically eliminated.
Byrobowl || holds the top seed in Yahoo’s current order, with Tuten My Own Horn and Shough Me the Money also 6–2. Ninja Turtles (4–4) holds the last seat; Bryce Young… (4–4) is first out. The Raptors and Block Party Ray are both 3–5 and close enough to keep the appetizers warm. Baldy, True QB and RedPanda are 2–6 with six regular-season games remaining. List of shame: nobody — no team is officially eliminated. No formal clinch or elimination test is claimed by this snapshot.
My call: the sixth seat changes hands before Week 14. That is not a prediction of which family member takes it; the table is too close, and the Raptors have already proved that one loud week can ruin the seating plan.
